Hold Me Tight Couples Workshop
Hold Me Tight Workshop Schedule
Coming soon in 2013! Four workshop scheduled so far this year. The first is on March 15th-17th
This live workshop is designed to enhance a couple’s relationship so they have better success with communication and problem solving. This series is a great option for couples who want to strengthen their relationship or who would like to have couples counseling but cannot afford the expense of private counseling.
Held on a Friday eve, all day Saturday and Sunday from 1:00 to 5pm.
THE HOLD ME TIGHT WORKSHOPS
Conversations For Connection – A Relationship Education Workshop for Couples
Based on the book
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
by Dr. Susan Johnson
www.holdmetight.com
We have added additional material based on the work of John Gottman and the 7 principles that make marriage work.
Contact me for more information
contactme@patriciarohani.com
503-896-6796
Well we’ve made it thorough another year. As you look back on 2012 and forward to 2013, you may be reflecting on where your journey has taken you and where you want to go this coming year. Some questions to ponder may be- have you made plans for your journey, or will you wander aimlessly through? Did you come to a fork in the road last year? How could this year be different?
Of course, we all come upon the unexpected as we travel; there are often obstacles along the way, those of our own making, and those we cannot control. There are also encounters with awe-inspiring wonders and blessings. Plan as we might, there are unforeseen twists and turns, hills and valleys in this journey that is life. Who, and not what we take on the journey is often the key to our fulfillment. Relationships along the way often bring us our greatest joys and our deepest woundings. So if you are making goals for this new year, perhaps instead of focusing on the what, the who might be a better place to start.
Ask yourself, which are the relationships you need to nurture, repair, strengthen, or cut out of your life? Where will you start? Do you need help?
Make this coming year the best ever, not with the what you have but with the healthy relationships in your life. It can be a new beginning. You just need to take the first step.
If you live in the Portland metro area, (and even if you don’t) you have likely been affected by the tragic shootings at Clackamas Town Center. If you were not there when it happened, you might know someone who was. You have certainly seen coverage of the event repeatedly on the news, and even that could feel scary or traumatizing, certainly for children, who may have even greater difficulty processing this unfathomable act.
In the next days, weeks, or months, you may experience symptoms that feel scary, disturbing, or disruptive to life. You may experience increased anxiety, depression, or grief reactions. You may also feel like you are re-experiencing the event with flashbacks, nightmares, or physical reactions. You may feel numb or avoid places, people, or things that remind you of the tragedy. You may remember in detail, not be able to remember at all or block certain aspects of the event. Feeling jumpy, angry, always on alert, difficulty concentrating or falling and staying asleep are also common. Children may be clingy, fear separation, withdraw, or exhibit aggressive behaviors. They may revert to behaviors of an earlier age, such as thumb sucking or bed-wetting or have physical symptoms. You may see repetitive patterns in play or art in an effort to work through the trauma. Sleep troubles, new phobias, and escalated anxiety are not uncommon.
While these symptoms are unpleasant, they are normal reactions to the trauma you have experienced. Talking to family and friends, telling your story, and practicing self-care will help you through this difficult time. If you feel that these symptoms are overwhelming and more help is needed, it is available. Listed below are some links to resources, and feel free to call me at 503-896-6796 and make an appointment.
Stress-Free Back to School For Kids, Moms, and Dads
Patricia Rohani MA MFT LPC
It seems like summer just started and before you know it, the time has come to begin preparing for back to school. No matter whether your kiddos are 6 or 16, and you public school, private school, or home school, this can be a stressful and anxious time for both parents and children. Preparing for this transition, can help save on tension, savor the last minutes of summer, and ease into the new school year.
Depending on the age of your children, involve them in this preparation. For students of all ages this could include a “date time” with mom or dad that includes shopping for clothes and supplies and a special lunch or snack. For older students, the experience of budgeting for back to school could be a valuable activity.
Give as much choice as possible to the child within reason. Picking out the color and design of notebooks, backpacks, etc. and choices for back to school clothes (only choices that parents approve of) gives the child a sense of control in his life and signals to him you believe he is capable.
Attune to emotional states. Acknowledge your child’s excitement, fears and anxieties and encourage her to talk about them. Ignoring or minimizing them will only indicate to your child that her emotions are abnormal or wrong and does not allow for your child to learn how to regulate her emotions in a healthy way. Visit the school with your child if she is anxious about new surroundings. Talk about times in which you were anxious and how you overcame that anxiety. A small transitional object might help ease a child’s fears…such as a picture of the family or an “I believe in you note” tucked in a pocket.
Reestablish the routines needed for the school year before school starts, not the day of. Think about bedtimes, mealtimes, chores etc. that might have gone by the wayside during summer. If your child must wake up at 6:30 on school days, don’t wait until the first day of school to reinstate this. Talk about these scheduling changes and involve your child with making a schedule. For older children, put them in charge of waking themselves with an alarm. Have several days of dry runs where they get themselves up, dressed, and have breakfast by an appointed time. Remind teens to allow plenty of time for showering, hair, makeup, clothing etc. These elements are important to teens, so don’t discount them!
Count down to the first day (think advent calendar) and plan a special breakfast or something memorable on that first day. Give your child some control- buying or bringing his lunch, the outfit he wears on the first day, bus or dropping him off, or for homeschoolers which subject comes first (math or language arts) …and plan this the day before not the day of.
Remember it is normal for a child (and a parent) to be anxious about these transitions. These anxieties usually pass within the first few days or weeks with some TLC for all involved. If anxieties persist and you are unsure if as to whether this is normal or needs to be addressed on a deeper level consult your school or a mental health professional.
Some favorite books for parents that cover many dilemmas and choices are the Love and Logic series by Fay and Cline. Some informational web sites are: http://www.loveandlogic.com/
http://clackamas.or.networkofcare.org/mh/home/index.cfm
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/child-and-adolescent-mental-health/index.shtml
“Therapy begins with connection. Filled with heroism of a journey into the unknown, patients join with therapists in exploring the past, living fully in the present, and becoming the creative authors of the future chapters of their lives.” (Solomon and Siegel 2003, p. 
It seems like summer just started and before you know it, the time has come to begin preparing for back to school. No matter whether your kiddos are 6 or 16, and you public school, private school, or home school, this can be a stressful and anxious time for both parents and children. Preparing for this transition, can help save on tension, savor the last minutes of summer, and ease into the new school year.
Are you going through a “breakup”? You know it is painful, and now brain research explains more. If the situation is feeling too intense to manage alone or, if you are coping in unhealthy ways, feel free to give me a call.
Read the article, and practice some self-care!
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-mindful-self-express/201104/the-neuroscience-relationship-breakups
What is stress doing to you? Can you learn to take some valuable self care time this new year to evaluate your stress level and make healthy changes? Take a deep breath, relax, and watch this video. I just watched it and think everyone should in preparation for the coming new year. You can find it on Netflix streaming,… or at the library.
National Geographic: Stress: Portrait of a Killer
2008NR 50 minutes
The serially overworked already know that stress is a near-constant fixture in modern-day living. But to what degree is stress affecting our bodies — and is there any way to healthfully combat it? With a focus on the work of Stanford University neurobiologist Robert Sapolsky, this National Geographic program looks at the latest science to see what researchers are learning about this insidiously silent killer.
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Today, many people experience anxiety, depression, and relational issues that interfere with life as they want to live it. Often people have experienced trauma, abuse, grief and loss, or other occurrences that give rise to these symptoms. Many have learned ways of relating in their families of origin that are dysfunctional for their present situations. Others may struggle to interact in a culturally diverse world, family or relationship without an understanding why we keep encountering problems.
There is help, through working with a kind, caring, and skilled professional. Having someone understand your struggles and walk along the path with you to freedom, healing and wholeness can make all the difference. Along this path, you will learn tools and gain insight as to the whys of how this came to be and how you can arrive at the destination you desire.
So if you are experiencing:
anxiety
depression
fear
feelings of shame and guilt
marital or family conflicts
cultural conflicts
unwanted thoughts or flashbacks from past trauma and abuse
struggling to be the spouse or parent you want to be
a deep sense that something is wrong, yet you just cant pinpoint the source
Do you know that YOU are worth the journey to healing?
Allow me to journey with you to a new and brighter future.
Let the journey begin!
